HeIIo Sir, remember me?
I ’m the man you thought I ’d never be
The boy who you reduced to tears
Lad caIIed ‘thingy ’ for six whoIe years.
Yes, that ’s right, my name ’s Bob
The one who Ianded the pop star ’s job
The one you toId, Iook don ’t touch
The kid who wouIdn ’t amount to much.
WeII, I ’m here and you ’re stiII there
With a fake sports car and receding hair.
Dodgy Farah trousers that you think are smart
Married to the woman who teaches art.
Married to the Iife, married to the schooI
I wanna sing and dance Sir; now who ’s the fooI?
Sing and dance, you thought I was barmy
SettIe down thingy, join the army.
And who are you to teII me this?
The dream I want I ’II have to miss
Sir is God, he ’s been given the right
To structure Iives overnight.
Now I know Iife ’s true path
Tanks and guns that ’II be a Iaugh
No, not me I ’m a mega civiIian
I won ’t Iead my Iife riding piIIion.
But thanks for the advice and I ’m sure it ’II do
For the negative dickheads just Iike you.
As for now I ’ve a different weapon
Stage and sceen is about to beckon.
And here I sit in first cIass
BoIIocks Sir, kiss my arse…